Quotable quotes

The other day I was cleaning out my old box from work (at the C'link) and came across my last project's "quotable quotes". Paul (the boss) used to collect some funny quotes that were said by various staff members. I still look back and laugh at them, but am posting them for my benefit, because most of you won't know why some of them are so funny unless you know the people (e.g. the first one).

I don't care about the out year figures. James to Nina and Richard.

I'm willing to take a pay cut. James to Paul.

That's the worst thing you've ever said to me Paul. James to Paul and Nina after tricking James into thinking he was going to have to go work with another certain team.

Would you like to step outside? Julie to Paul during a Steering Committee meeting (I kid you not, she was serious!)

September has not officially ended. James at the 4th October team meeting.

There are some things you would not buy second hand...like underpants, for instance. Richard to Paul, James and Nina.

James does it better than Richard. Paul to Nina after asking why James' was doing Richard's Change Request.

Oh my God, we've hit a toddler. James describing his initial thought after hearing Nina scream at seeing a Huntsman spider in the car.

DIMS - is that an Executive Support System? Paul to Julie. (One of my personal favourites as it was delivered so so quickly.)

Most tools will be compatible with Open Office in six months time. Jason, Dec 06.

Doug appealed to Thomas' inner nerd. Brett at the xmas party on why Thomas was late.

If things all work, it will be fine. Jason.

You get so much more done when you actually talk to people. Derek to Paul after taking Derek to an infrastructure meeting.

Steve Waugh and Johnny Depp are very similar. James.

Sometimes I think you live in fairy land and me in reality. Nina to James at James' aim at wanting all things perfect.

I was worried about the organisational imperatives, not the project priorities. Paul to Nina, Jason and James.

Your good news today does not cancel my bad news today. Paul to Nina.